This newfound separation is wondrous, but also somewhat scary to the budding toddler, particularly when she gains the capacity to stand upright and walk. Walking signifies the hallmark of physical separation, and the accompanying increased differentiation that naturally occurs.
It also presents another problem for the toddler who now finds herself alternately elated at her new skills and new vision of the world from the upright position , and anxious during periods of distance from mommy which are somewhat frightening. Remember, this little person has come a long way, but emotionally she is not yet a fully individuated little self that is able to maintain the security of her mommy's love when away from her. She now has to learn to enjoy mommy from a distance, and to maintain that solid bond from afar.
This is done simply by "practicing". Baby moves away from mommy, turns around and looks at her, gestures to her, makes sounds at her, and then runs back to her. Mommy serves as her "home base" - the place where baby can refuel by making physical contact and reestablishing that emotional bond before going back out into the world to explore. Stanley and Nancy Greenspan call this new kind of practicing communication "distal communication" , which is characterized by the toddler's maintaining the feeling of attachment over distance through the use of gestures, voice, and eye contact.
The toddler is literally practicing having mommy at a distance, while also practicing and mastering her new skills of locomotion and independence. Peek-a-boo takes on a very active quality during this phase. It allows the toddler to practice losing and regaining mommy over and over, similar to the practice of moving away from and back to mommy for refueling. The phase called rapprochement Mahler, begins around 18 months of age, and signifies the infant's full status now as a toddler.
As the toddler's physical capacities increase, allowing for greater distancing and locomotion, there is also an expansion of her cognitive capacities and need for more intimate emotional experiences. Whereas she was most interested in exploring the new world with mommy serving primarily as a home base and refueling station, she now moves her interests in the direction of social interaction. Instead of being primarily interested in the world of things, she has a new interest in personal exchange.
Mommy takes on a new role, which is someone with whom the toddler can share her experience, and whom she can imitate and identify with. She brings mommy toys to play with and share; she darts away from her until mommy chases her and swoops her up in her arms; she imitates mommy's facial expressions, and mommy mirrors them back to her. The toddler again plays peek-a-boo, but in a much more elaborate fashion. She uses many more gestures and sounds and may extend the game to hide and seek.
Playful Questions. What makes me giggle? What animals like to hide? Where is my favorite hiding place?
What games do I love to play? Toddlers are also keen on the game, especially when they can play peekaboo while hiding from you. Around the same time that babies grasp object permanence, they typically begin to exhibit strong preferences for their caregivers.
It's no coincidence that many babies start to develop separation anxiety as early as around 7 to 8 months, about the same time when object permanence really clicks in baby's brain. A baby who cozily snuggled in a visiting grandparent's loving arms as a newborn might suddenly start crying whenever Grandma or Grandpa try to pick her up.
Reassure them that it's nothing personal — it's just separation anxiety, the natural flipside of object permanence. What's next in the milestone department? More baby games , of course! What to Expect follows strict reporting guidelines and uses only credible sources, such as peer-reviewed studies, academic research institutions and highly respected health organizations. Learn how we keep our content accurate and up-to-date by reading our medical review and editorial policy.
The educational health content on What To Expect is reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts to be up-to-date and in line with the latest evidence-based medical information and accepted health guidelines, including the medically reviewed What to Expect books by Heidi Murkoff.
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A bassinet serves the same purpose, but with a smaller footprint.
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